MASH (1970)

Directed By:  Robert Altman
Starring:  Donald Sutherland, Tom Skerritt, Elliot Gould, Sally Kellerman, Robert Duvall and Fred Williamson
Nominated For:  Best Picture, Best Editing, Best Director and Best Supporting Actress
Won For:  Best Adapted Screenplay


If more doctors were like this....we'd all be fucked.

MASH is what the title says it is.  A literal mash-up of mini plot lines served up on the backdrop of the Korean War.  The story centers around three surgeons played by Donald Sutherland, Elliot Gould and Tom Skerritt, who use booze, sex and low brow comedy hi-jinx to balance their sanity while faced with the horrors of war.  Although saying the story centers on them is a bit of an overstatement...there really isn't much story here.

The plot is mostly nonexistent, but I suppose that was the point.  It's more a set of continuously flowing vignettes featuring many different characters.  It's no wonder the film transitioned so easily into one of the most successful shows in television history.  Traveling seamlessly through stories about Tokyo whorehouses, football games and the head nurse's pubic hair, MASH was practically destined to be told in an episodic format.  Overall the film works, but in the end you don't feel attached to any part of it.  The movie just kinda starts and then eventually it ends.  There's absolutely zero closure here.

Don't let that discourage you though.  MASH is entertaining and at times extremely witty.  Some jokes fall flat, but most are well executed.  Much of the film is improvised, but unlike our modern improvisational comedies by Judd Apatow or Will Ferrell, this feels natural and unforced.  Sutherland and Gould are fantastic as egocentric martini drinking surgeons. Although, they are some of the WORST doctors I've ever encountered in screen history.  Don't get me wrong, they're fully competent surgeons, but they spend more time playing golf, sleeping with nurses, and disobeying commanding officers when they should be trying to treat the soldiers.  These guys are like the Police Academy of doctors.  They're somewhere in between House and Dr. Spaceman from 30 Rock.  To put it simply, I'd rather be captured by Charlie, or whatever racist slang we called the Koreans, than receive treatment from Elliot Gould.  

The film's director is the real star here.  Robert Altman uses a combination of overlapping dialogue and tight zooms to create an atmosphere that sucks you in for the whole journey.  I'm actually very excited to see his other Oscar nominated film Gosford Park (2000).  I hope that film keeps the same style of organized chaos because it definitely worked here.  While not a jaw dropping war epic or a laugh out loud comedic masterpiece, MASH certainly deserved it's Oscar nod.


Final Rating: B

Up next...Love Story (1970).  I am fucking dreading this one.

Why...why..why....?

So let's begin at...well...the beginning?

My goal is to watch and review every film that's been nominated for Best Picture from 1970 until now.  Currently, this list has an even total of two-hundred movies, but every January, that list will obviously grow as the Academy nominates ten more.  I realize that's a crap-load of movies for me to watch, let alone review, but I'm up for the challenge.  I should be able to keep a pace of one review a week, but I'm aiming for two a week.

Here's the list of films.

At first glance, watching these movies sounds pretty damn easy, but when I really delve deep into the films that comprise this list, I'm not so confident.  It seems as though for every film like The Godfather (1972) and Pulp Fiction (1994) there are twice as many like All That Jazz (1979) and Juno (2007).

To put it simply...there are some real shit-fests on this list.  Want some examples?


Breaking Away (1979):  Isn't that about bike riding?  Ugh.

The Crying Game (1992):  I believe this has something to do with chicks with dicks.

Kiss of the Spider Woman (1985):  I have a feeling that no actual Spider-Women will show up here.

The Emigrants (1972):  A three-hour long Swedish film.  Fuck my life.


I feel out-classed looking at this list.  I'm like a homeless man looking at a fancy menu.  I'll eat the La Terrine de Foie Gras, but I'll probably mispronounce it and wish it were a cheeseburger the whole time.  To be clear, by no means am I an uncultured nitwit.  I just prefer junk food cinema.  Give me a triple feature of Black Dynamite, The Thing and Die Hard, and I'll be a happy boy.  Although, I guess that's what this whole thing is about.  I need to break out of my comfort zone.  I can't continue calling myself a "Film Geek", but have never seen Schindler's List (1993) or Chinatown (1974).  So let's do this!

As for the reviews themselves, I'm going to try to keep things brief.  If you're really dying to read an in-depth breakdown of Forrest Gump (1994), then there are genuinely thousands of "legitimate" movie review sites for you, but that's not what this is about.  I'm a mailman, not a college educated film critic.   

DON'T: Expect long-winded expositions about symbolism. 

DO: Expect short, but witty opinions about plot, character and overall entertainment value, written at slightly  above a 4th grade level.

Speaking of 4th grade, I think I'm going to go with a letter system for my reviews.  A through F, just like school.  Personally I hate star ratings.  Allowing me only FIVE options to grade a movie is just not enough!  I think saying C- is a much better way to gauge how good a film rather than saying three stars.  I hate when I stare for way too long at my NetFlix page trying to decide how many stars to give movies.  So this is how it's gonna be on Man vs. Film.  No stars, no thumbs and no bullshit.

One last thing...the rules.  I only have two, so this will go quick.

1)  I need do this in some semblance of an order.  So I'm starting with 1970 and ending with 2000-whenever-this-project-is-over.  I'm no scientist, but I think if I do one review a week, I'll finish around 2045.  Someone should probably check my math on that though, I think I forgot to carry the remainder.

2)  Even if a film is horrible, boring and a total waste of my time, I WILL finish it.  I can already tell that this rule is going to hurt me, but if I don't finish all these films then what's point of doing the project?


Let's begin.  First up MASH (1970).